I’ve cried gallons of tears and thrown out garbage bags of used tissues. I remind myself over and over that Emeril is at peace. He’ll never have to suffer the indignity of another enema or the embarrassment of everyone knowing his personal private bathroom issues.
Emeril was more than a furry feline to me; he was my kitty soulmate. His passing leaves a constant dull ache inside me, which comforts me in a strange way. One should mourn the loss of a loved one. It should hurt and the pain shouldn’t disappear in a moment or two. Or ever.
What’s hard are the moments I forget that he is gone, then remember.
And the wound reopens again. The tears flow again.
Emeril lived a great life, and I find comfort in my memories of my special guy. Please indulge me while I share a few tall tails.
Emeril hated wearing clothes, but I thought he looked so sassy in his scarves. One day I put on his scarf and he fussed—like normal. I went into the kitchen to make dinner while he lounged in the living room. Eventually I noticed that he was no longer wearing his scarf, so I searched all over for it. Under my bed. In his litter box. Everywhere. But I couldn’t find it. Later, I went into the bathroom and found his scarf floating in the toilet. Yup. Emeril threw his scarf in the potty. Emeril was never shy about expressing his opinions.
I’ve always found it grossly unfair that they make a lot of dog clothes but few outfits for kitties. Emeril, on the other hand, was greatly relieved by this since he really, really hated wearing costumes. He didn’t like scarves (obviously) but he could tolerate wearing one if absolutely required. But wearing costumes—MEOW! Eventually he figured out that if he would allow me to snap a few pictures then I would remove whatever humiliating costume he had to wear immediately afterwards.
My memories give me comfort and peace. And yes, bring tears too. I miss him every day, but I’m glad he is no longer suffering and back to being the sassy Emeril I love and adore up in heaven. I only pray that God doesn’t mind sharing his throne with him because Emeril always claims the best seat in the house as his own.
I miss and love you, Emeril. Take care of your little brother and please play nicely with him.
Until we meet again …
Tanya