Hi Ya, everyone! Welcome to another edition of Max Mondays! Can I tell you a secret? We also celebrate Max Tuesday, Max Wednesday, Max Thursday, Max Friday, Max Saturday and Max Sunday in our home. Every day is all about MaxE!
I thought long and hard about what I wanted to meow about today and decided to give you a progress report on training my pet. Mama is a good pet but had a few quirks that I needed to address immediately.
When she first brought me home, she talked a lot about the prima donna cat, Emeril. “He’s so handsome” and “I miss him.” Blah, Blah, Blah, BLAH! Whatever. Through sheer awesomeness and adorableness, I won Mama over. Sure, I still have to occasionally pretend to admire Emeril’s picture, but I’m clearly the Kitty of the House.
The next issue I needed to address was her obsession with my personal private business. She would critique the number of times I used the litter box and even gave me feedback. “MaxE, you’re not peeing enough! Are you sick?” or “MaxE, you’re peeing too much! Are you sick?” followed by “MaxE, you poop so good! YEAH!!!”
She constantly checked my gums and peered into my ears. Complained that I felt hot and threatened to take my temperature. No way was I letting her stick that thing up my cute rump!
It was weird, but since she had lots of toys for me to play with, gave me treats every day and basically did everything I commanded, I figured she just needed some training.
Mama has shown great improvement this past year. She no longer boots me from the bedroom for being “naughty”. Or yells at me for jumping on the table. Or nudging things off tables, desks, bookshelves or dressers. She gives me belly rubs and kitty massages instead.
Don’t get me wrong—there is still work to be done. I could use more kitty beds and toys. She still refuses to give me a pet birdie, even though I would take excellent care of my birdie. I’d lick him clean every day and call him Yum Yum. And I am apparently naughty when I walk on the kitchen counters and help myself to cat food. Whatever.
Mama is a good a pet overall. She did proclaim a day after me and prima donna cat never had his own day. Max 1. Emeril 0. Mama gets an A on her report card for knowing who rules. Hint. It’s me, MaxE!
See you next Max Monday!