I‘m back! Thanks everyone for sticking around and letting Mighty Max entertain you. My big project—a complete overhaul of The Heavy Purse website is live and looks terrific in my opinion. It’s possible that I am also biased. 🙂 Take a peek and let me know what you think!
One thing I love is learning new things, which I definitely did with the website overhaul. I learned about media queries and responsive web design which both fascinated and greatly annoyed me. Next up, I’ll be slowly be giving Eat Laugh Purr a makeover too. Its needed a refresh for some time, but it will need to happen in between other projects, so no ETA. If you need a new website or a refresh to your current one, please let me know. I’d love to help build a website you and your readers love.
Okay, enough about work, let’s talk about me, me, me. LOL! No seriously, I’ve been writing notes on all the things I wanted to share with you. I’ve missed everyone and will definitely get caught up with what is new and exciting in your lives this week.
As you may recall, my focus word this year is courage. While I don’t consider myself cowardly, I also talk myself out of doing things because I am scared to hear “no”.
“No. I don’t need a new freelance writer” is interpreted to mean your writing sucks.
This fear of “no” sometimes paralyzes me. I overanalyze what it means and take it personally. When sometimes “no” just simply means “no” and there is nothing sinister behind it. But I obsess that there is something wrong … with me.
So I talk myself out of seeking new opportunities. In fact, the more important or desirable the opportunity, the greater my fear of hearing “no” so I convince myself to play it safe and do nothing. This safety is an illusion or lie but since I chose not to pursue the opportunity, then I hold the power, not them. At least that is what I tell myself as I lay awake staring at the ceiling at night now regretting not trying.
Am I the only who does this?
I feel confident that I’m not. I’m pretty sure the whole self-help industry thrives because of people like me! And you’re welcome.
I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about “courage” and “no” and how I want to live my life. Who I want to be. And honestly, the “who” I’m still trying to figure out. We are so eager to know “who” we are, so we can triumphantly announce it when someone asks us “what do you do”.
I suspect what we “do” isn’t necessarily who we are. But that is another post for the future. 🙂
What I do know is that I may never love the word “no” in relation to opportunities I want, but by not pursuing opportunities, I am the one telling myself “no”.
I am the one rejecting myself.
Not them.
Me.
Which is far, far, far worse.
I can’t control what others think and do. I can only control my own actions and my own responses to things that happen to me. And what I do know with absolute certainty is that I don’t want to reject myself or my abilities.
I want to share and believe in them.
So I am putting on my big girl pants and learning to embrace every “yes” and “no” and to see them as equal positives. To remember that which ever response I receive—is proof of my courage and my faith in me.
And that is real power and who I am really am.
Cloud photo courtesy of Dan Powell via flickr. Artwork by sasspurrella designs.
Tanya, You have a lot of talent, and the people that do work with you are quite fortunate.
I know it is hard not to take the word no personally, but often times it simply means the person isn’t ready, or doesn’t have the money.
And you are right, many of us fear hearing the word no. It actually really upsets me.
But then I look back at all the times I have been told no when I really wanted to hear yes, and I realize that getting that job or that business contract, or that date, would not have worked out well. It was like something was protecting me, and what I wanted just wasn’t meant to be.
You are so right, Sicorra! It’s strange how caught up we get on the word “no”. Just as much as I may hate hearing it, people may hate saying it to me too. 🙂 And I absolutely agree–everything happens for a reason, even getting some “no’s” that hurt in the moment. Sometimes you hear things later and realize you dodged a bullet. And thank you so much for your kind words and support too!
Oh my gosh, Tanya – the new re-design looks AWESOME!!! Excellent work, my friend. Girl, hang in there. You are so right in that quote about courage. You can win your race, Tanya!
Thanks, Laurie! I thought it turned out great too! 🙂 It still surprises me every time I look at it though – I’m still waiting for the pink background to pop up! LOL! Thanks for your support, Laurie. I always appreciate it!
Tanya I love the quote in the second photo… Courage really is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying You’ll try again tomorrow. In the face of everything, to give it another try is REALLY courageous! Great reminder!
I love it too, Arelis. As soon as I found that quote, it resonated so strongly with me and I knew I had to share it. Sometimes we think courage must be bold and outrageous but that is not always the cause. Sometimes it quiet persistence that wins the day.
I hear ya, Tanya! My issue is lack of confidence, which leads to lack of courage. Sometimes I have it, and other times, I don’t. I know I’ve missed opportunity because I’ve talked myself down. Though as I’ve gotten older, I’ve gotten the “what the heck” attitude, and jumped in both feet first. Like blogging! lol
Have a great day!
Me, too. Sometimes I am on top of the world and other times I’m not! I will say as I’ve grown older, I find myself going for things that I may have talked myself out of in the past. There is still room for improvement though – but I’m getting better! I remember the absolute terror of pressing publishing on my first blog post. But I’m so glad I did it. You have a great day too!
Tanya, you are such a wonderful and talented person, not to mention, you have a pretty awesome cat too! I love the new look at The Heavy Purse, you did a fantastic job! Your courage quote graphic really hit home with me, it’s funny how just a few words can mean so much. Everything definitely does happen for a reason! I hope your having a great week girl!
Thank you so much for your kind words, Stephanie. They mean a lot of me. 🙂 I do have an awesome cat. Max is just the happiest cat and I love that little scamp. I’m glad my courage quote resonated with you too. It’s something I really need embrace and remember. Hope your week is treating you well too!