Max Monday: I’m Baaaaaack!


Hi ya, everyone! Did you miss me last week? I missed you, but when Mama begged to take over last week, I had to give an affirmative meow. I have a soft spot for her. Plus, she shook my paw that I would NOT have to wear bunny ears for Easter. I have no idea why she would want me to wear them in the first place. I am a cat, not a bunny.

She did keep her promise, although I think it may have been accidental. I found her hunting through her basket of cat clothes on Sunday, and apparently Emeril destroyed the bunny ears. It feels wrong, but apparently I owe the prima donna cat a thank you for sparing me the humiliation of wearing floppy pink ears. He’s still a diva though.

Whereas I am the best kitty. I am cool. I can poop. I don’t need IV fluids or medicine. I am playful. And super well-behaved.

Okay, that last one may be a bit of a stretch, but everything else is the truth. Paw swear!

I meowed to Mama about my idea to become a cat nurse as I thought it would be a good financial move to own multiple business, especially since NO ONE has any pet birdies or hamsters for me to pet sit. I still think you are lying about twitter, but Mama insists it’s not a real birdie.

Anyway, Mama said no. She claims to support my desire to be a cat-a-preneuer but doesn’t want me to take care of people who are sick. I don’t know why. I am slightly suspicious that Mama only said yes to the pet sitting business because she doesn’t expect me to get any clients. Sick people are apparently more common than pet birdies or hamsters.

I’d really like to be my own cat boss and contribute to the family fund. Then I could buy my own deluxe cat tower and pet birdie named Yum Yum. Do you have any ideas on what business I should start next? I am open to your suggestions. Please remember I don’t have outside privileges or opposable thumbs. Mama also has to type and read for me, but she is good at translating my meows.

And again, if you do have a real life birdie named Twitter, please consider me the next time you need a pet sitter.


  1. says

    Oh, Max, you sure do have your hands full, trying to manage all of your dreams and aspirations, don’t you! Maybe you could start a cat-schooling site, where you teach other kitties how to be smart and good, like you. :-)

    • Max - The Coolest Cat says

      That’s a great idea! I should star a Cool Cat school. I am obviously very, very cool and can teach other cats to be cool too, although I’m not sure if any kitty is as cool as I am! I will talk to Mama about your idea and I’m sure she’d support it. Thank you, Laurie! Meow!!

  2. says

    “Please remember I don’t have outside privileges or opposable thumbs” – LMAO!! MaxE is so cute, I love these posts, even if he does fudge a bit. 😉

    • Max - The Coolest Cat says

      I am adorable! Thank you for noticing! I don’t know what LMAO means but I assume it means that I am super duper awesome! I sometimes exaggerate but only a little bit. I am well-behaved 99% of the time. Okay maybe 98% of the time. Maybe a smidge less. I’m not good at math but I am good more than bad … Some days. I think. Meow!


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