Sunday marked the two-year anniversary of my beloved Emeril’s passing. Now for some people the fact that I continue to mourn a cat may seem strange. I will remind you that Americans spent more than $60 million on their pets last year. It may be an insane number, but pets hold favored positions in our homes. And my home was no different.
Emeril may have looked goofy when I brought him home, but as his fur grew back, he quickly became The Most Handsome Cat in the World. Okay, okay, I am the one who gave him the title, but he was a handsome devil and he knew it.
He would preen when I’d tell him how handsome was and he never grew tired of hearing it. He loved being brushed, although he seemed to prefer it when my Mom brushed him. In fairness, I tended to be an aggressive brusher while my Mom babied him.
Side note: My Mom was an aggressive brusher when she used to comb my hair as a child. It’s not fair that the grand-cat received better treatment. It seems like whether it’s – cats or kids – grand-babies are always spoiled.
Emeril was pretty laid back cat except for two things:
- He had a blankie that he loved and expected me to spread over the sofa before he would deem it worthy of him laying on.
- He expected to be feed three meals a day at specific times. He would yowl and throw a fit if his meal of kibble was not served as expected.
He did enjoy a routine. I remember one night when it was clearly past our bedtime and I was still watching TV. I could hear Emeril meowing and went to investigate. He was in bed, waiting for me to join him. Time for bed, Mommy! Or more like time to give my bedtime treat, woman! Meow!
He was a healthy cat until the last couple years of his life. He started having personal private bathroom issues (i.e. he was constipated) which was annoying, but we managed it. Then CRF (Chronic Renal Failure, aka kidney disease) reared it’s ugly head. He managed for almost 11 months but ultimately my brave, strong kitty couldn’t fight any longer.
It broke my heart, even though I knew he had been suffering and now was at peace. I tried to find solace in that fact, but it was so hard. Emeril was my kitty soul mate. Animals seem to instinctively know their owner’s heart and he was no different. He knew how to play me (and pretty much everyone else) and how to comfort me.
After he died, I went home to visit my parents. Before I left, I was doing some laundry and found one of his bouncy balls in the dryer. Somehow it must have gotten tossed in with the laundry, which was strange because it had been months since Emeril had the energy to play. It felt like a little sign from Emeril saying he was okay and I should find someone who could help mend my broken heart. And who might appreciate a bouncy ball.
I did, Emeril. Thank you for sending a big, goofy cat who makes me laugh every day.
Emeril was such a part of my life for so long that somedays I still forget he’s gone. Those days are the worst. They happen rarely now (thanks to MaxE), but every once in awhile something happens and I think Emeril would like … and then I remember.
Two years later, I still wait for the pain to subside, until I discovered …
It’s not pain, but love. Endless love for a faithful companion who I will see again.
I miss you, Emeril!
Tanya
Hi Tanya.
I still grieve my cat who passed away in 2001. She had kidney failure as well.
Finally, just this year, I got a new kitten. I forgot how much I love these little guys.
Hi Karissa. I don’t think I’ll even stop grieving for Emeril and have learned to accept that as being okay. 🙂 I never realized how many kitties suffered from kidney failure until Emeril got diagnosed. It’s a tough diagnosis. I’m glad you got a new kitten. They do bring so much to joy into our lives and homes!
Emeril was a beautiful guy 🙂
Thanks, Karissa! 🙂 I think so too. Of course, I am biased. 🙂
Aw, what a sweet way to remember your cat. When our Peaches died about six years ago, we all took it hard. She was with us for years. We think she had a heart attack because she was fine until she tried to jump on a patio table. She normally would nail the landing but something happened. The next thing we know she’s walking around us crying, she runs by my daughter’s window and that was it. I’m just glad it was quick.
Now I want to look for pictures of her :). Have a great day hun and I think he was very handsome!
~cori
Thanks, Corina! Emeril was indeed very handsome and knew it. 🙂 I’m sorry to hear about Peaches, but I’m glad it happened fast. That was the good and bad part of kidney disease, Emeril lived for 11 months after the diagnosis, but they weren’t always very good days. I know he’s happy and playful and back to his sassy self again, so that’s what I choose to focus on now.
Now I’m crying. Beautifully written, Tanya. He was a gorgeous cat. I miss my dog so much (died Jan 2013) but life is complicated right now so we don’t get another although I think it would help me a lot. His name was Fergus and he was a chocolate brown standard poodle. My baby. We have a 19 year old calico cat named Phoebe. Last pet in the house right now, but my extended family all have lots of dogs and cats.
Thank you, Deb. I’m sorry to her about Fergus (great name by the way) and I know how hard it is to lose a beloved pet. There was a part of me that needed more time to mourn Emeril before I got another cat, but a larger part of me needed a cat RIGHT NOW! Lucky for Max (and me), the right now part won. 🙂
I don’t think it’s weird to still grieve – he was a living soul that touched and affected your life. Sorry for your loss, Tanya. That is a great quote, and so very true.
Thanks, Anna! Some people think it’s weird on my part but Emeril was a huge part of my life for 10 years. And I never denied being the crazy cat lady … I am crazy about cats after all! LOL! I love the quote too and it’s a great reminder that it hurts because we love.