I‘m not going to lie: I really struggled writing this post. In fact, I kept putting it off and looking for distractions (also known as excuses) to avoid writing this. I even went so far as to dust and I hate dusting. It makes me sneeze. And yes, I recognize if I dusted more frequently, then there would be less dust to make me sneeze. This type of thinking can give me a headache, so I avoid it. Just like I tried to avoid writing about my goals for the month.
It’s not like I don’t believe in goals. I very much do and typically respond best to clear, actionable goals. Professionally, I am very goal-driven because I like the satisfaction goal success gives me. But when it comes to my personal life, I don’t take them very seriously. This needs to change. But I’ve been feeling incredibly resistant to it, and I’m not sure why.
I’m Still Peeling the Onion
I love the movie Shrek. Puss in Boots is my favorite character, for obvious reasons, but I love all the characters. And in the movie, Shrek compares himself to an onion with layers to peel away.
I’ve got layers too. Sometimes, I peel away a layer thinking I’m “fixed” and ready to move on and get healthy, but then discover another layer to peel. And this layer seems to be superglued.
I truly want to get healthy and lose weight. And I truly believe that I can do it. I also am truly struggling to make the commitment and do the work. It’s confusing and a little disheartening at times. But I am not giving up. I am, however, starting slow and taking baby steps. It has been my tendency to attempt too much at once and give-up because I feel overwhelmed (I most likely did this intentionally too). I’m trying to find that balance where I am compassionate with myself and not a bully about past or present mistakes, while also being firm, focused and taking action. It’s a hard balance to find.
My February Goals Are …
At first, I was a bit embarrassed to share them. They seem so simple and basic. And they are. However, every single goal brings me another step closer to getting fit and healthy and more importantly — they are things that I wasn’t doing before.
- Start a Vitamin Regiment: I want to take a daily vitamin, calcium, and biotin (my hair is thinning and I’m not a happy camper about it).
- Drink More Water: I don’t meet the daily requirements, not even close. I’m going to buy a bottle and fill it every morning with the intent to drink at least 48 oz. This is lower than the recommended amount but a huge increase for me.
- Buy a swimsuit and swim 1-2 times a week: The pool in my apartment is closed for renovations but it is my understanding that it should reopen this week. It’s my intention that once this becomes consistent to add some strength training and another day of cardio, but I’m starting slow to help form a habit that I’ve been incredibly resistant to doing. 🙂
- Practice daily gratitude: I believe that mental health plays a significant role in our physical health. Gratitude has always helped me recognize and value what I do have and more inclined to work toward what I want with a grateful heart.
You likely noticed that I didn’t include any food goals. This was intentional. I am doing much better in cutting back on sweets, eating more vegetables and fewer carbs, which I intend to keep doing in February. Right now I want to focus on the above goals because they represent the foundation to build upon, and I will add some specific goals around food next month.
Starting a New Way of Life
This is really exciting and really scary for me. I’ve been “heavy” for far too long and I’m anxious to say “bye Felicia” to my flab, but it also makes me a bit nervous too. I’ve used my weight as an excuse to not put myself out there or go beyond my comfort zone. Knowing that excuse will soon be gone, terrifies me and it also makes me really excited about the possibilities too.
What are you goals for February? Do you have any recommendations as to what brand or kind of vitamins to take?