Learning to Embrace and Accept Myself

It’s been a great start to 2016. I’ve been busy, which is always good, and more focused than ever (also good). My goals are starting to take shape, both personally and professionally. Many advocate for setting yearly goals, which I did but with very broad strokes. Trust me, I know getting healthy is a big, vague goal. However, I feel less overwhelmed and more focused when the time-frame is a bit narrower, which is why I chose to set monthly goals instead. The risk in setting too narrow of goals, of course, is to make sure that you’re still focused on the overall big picture. Otherwise, you might go off on some weird tangent and wind-up no where near your goal at the end of the year. One way I’m staying the course is through a strong focus word.

While in comparison to others, I may be a bit behind in selecting my focus word since it is already February. The good news I have decided to stop constantly comparing myself to others, which is such a relief and frees up so much time now that I’m not worrying over what so-and-so might think. Plus, I have been thinking about my focus word for some time now. It is something that I do take seriously, especially this year.

Have you ever felt like you’re on the brink of something good? That it’s your time? That’s how I feel right now. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think someone is going to wave a magical wand and make my life perfect (but if J.K. Rowling has a permanent spell for that, please let me know). I may be a dreamer but there is enough of a realist inside me to know the work comes before the results. What’s different is now I’m ready to do the work and no longer doubt that the results will follow. It’s why I’m going slow: to ensure my energy and focus are on the right things — the things that matter most.

Acceptance is My Focus Word this Year

Now that may seem like a strange focus word when you’re trying to get fit, so let me explain. I’m not accepting my flab or wimpy muscles. Nor am I accepting my clever excuses for why I cannot exercise or eat right. Nope. Those days are OVER! What I am accepting is my power to change what I can, such as lose weight and build muscles, while also accepting what I cannot change about my body, like miraculously growing 5 inches or having a cute button nose without plastic surgery.

I spend way too much time staring at the mirror, analyzing everything wrong or not ideal. Most girls do this at some point. We’re taught at very young age what perfection is from our Barbie dolls or the women and girls on TV or those who strike a pose on magazine covers. I’ll never fit that mold because I’m not Caucasian, blonde, tall or skinny. Don’t get me wrong — there is absolutely nothing wrong if you happen to fit that mold, just as there is nothing wrong with me.

I am learning to accept who I am and to embrace myself. To see my power and wield it wisely. To know that I am strong, beautiful (even today when I’m not fit) and imperfect. Perfection is highly overrated. We may have been taught to covet it, but it doesn’t truly exist (everyone, even so-called perfect people, have a laundry list of things they don’t like about themselves, real or imagined) and if it did — how boring.

Acceptance Equals Freedom

We humans are a bit of control freaks with our tendency to have a “my way or the highway” attitude. I tell people that I’m not a control freak, but secretly I am. 🙂 There is nothing wrong with wanting things a certain way, but we can get so rigid and inflexible. Life is never that simple or straightforward. It likes to throw curveballs when you least expect them.

Successful people know what they cannot control, so they don’t waste time and energy on trying to turn a circle into a square and instead focus on the things they can change. That’s my goal this year. I’m going to accept what I can control and stop losing sleep over what I cannot. This means I accept mistakes will be made on my journey to get healthy and that I’m also capable of dusting myself off from every mistake, learning and moving forward too.

Did you chose a focus word for this year? If so, please share your word and why you selected it.

Tanya

P.S. I’m also sharing a second focus word over at A Mindful Migration to support my goal of being more intentional with how I live and spend my money.