Hi ya, everyone! It’s me, Mighty Max! That’s right — it’s the third Monday of the month, which means MaxE is taking over the blog today. Oh boy! I love meowing to my many fans; you are the best! Normally I have so much to meow about: Mama being weird; Mama being goofy; Mama being annoying. But not today, so I asked my Mama for some help. Being she is a cool Mama (I am contractually obligated to meow this), she suggested I meow about books.
At first I thought Mama was being silly because being silly is what Mama does best. She is a huge book lover (although she does NOT love them more than me), and I assumed she just wanted to babble to me about all the books she is reading.
As if I care.
After some contemplation, I decided Mama was right. I should talk about books, specifically books about me and the fact that none exist.
This is rude and hurtful.
There should be millions of books about me. After all, I’m the coolest cat in the world.
This travesty must be fixed immediately, and I am just the feline to solve the problem. Because MaxE has a can-do attitude but sadly lacks the ability to write the books himself, I will suggest titles for books that y’all should write about me.
Here is a short list:
- MaxE is the coolest cat, ever!
- MaxE is better than Emeril!
- MaxE is super duper handsome!
- MaxE is a best boy, not a naughty boy!
- MaxE is innocent until proven guilty!
- Max loves to play and needs more toys!
- MaxE doesn’t need to wear clothes! And I mean ever!
- MaxE is not a constipated cat unlike some other kitty!
- MaxE needs a pet birdie named Yum Yum!
- MaxE is silly, sweet and fun!
- MaxE feels real bad about destroying … Just kidding!
WOW! That’s a lot of books. I’m gonna be more famous than I already am! I’ve already meowed a request to Mama to start writing books about me. She rolled her eyes at me, which I think means she’s gonna do it.
If she doesn’t, I’ll have my revenge because nobody puts MaxE in a corner.
My go-to move, when Mama needs to be reminded who runs the house, is to puke on her sandals. I don’t really understand why, but she runs around the apartment flapping her arms and yelling. Maybe she thinks she is a birdie and is trying to take flight.
I’m pretty sure she isn’t a birdie.
But it would be kind of cool if she could fly. She could carry me and we could chase birdies all day. Oh man — that would make a great book. Right? I thought so.
Let me know when you finish writing your book about me, the coolest cat, so I can give it my meow of approval!