Hi ya, everyone! It’s me, Mighty Max! Today I’m meowing about my Mama because it is her birthday month and she insists I celebrate her. This sounds awfully vain and presumptuous to me, but when I pointed that out to her, she growled at me. I wisely zipped my lips and agreed to put my presidential campaign on-hold this month. Besides, my birthday is in September and I want Mama to celebrate me all month long, so fair is fair … I guess.
Now I’ve meowed about Mama before, so I wasn’t really sure what I wanted to share with you today. But after several naps, I figured it out on my own: I’m going to tell you why I picked Mama to be my human pet.
Now Mama is under the mistaken belief that she chose me. This is untrue but a popular myth among human pets. We pets took a vote and decided it was best to let humans continue to believe they were the boss. You are not, but it’s okay if you think you are. We know the truth.
5 Reasons Why I Chose Mama
I love Mama and she makes an excellent human pet. Here’s why:
1. She Adores Me
This surprises no one because I am adorable. But I am sad to report that some pets do not have owners who adore them and take care of them the way they should. My Mama caters to my every need. I instantly saw that my Mama would adore me, so I put my best paw forward to get her attention and the rest is history.
2. She Only Gets Pretend Mad
My reputation for being mischievous is … true. I like to be naughty. Thus, my human pet needed to be super tolerant, and Mama talks tough but she’s pure mush inside. Now she does have some silly rules, like MaxE don’t jump on the table. MaxE, don’t push my vitamins off the table. MaxE, don’t be a bed hog and MaxE, don’t puke on my sandals. And so on. Sometimes, she gets downright crabby with my mischief-making ways, but she’s not really be mad because I’m adorable.
3. She Plays with Me
I am a super active cat. I LOVE to play. I pounce. Run around the home, meowing up a storm. Some human pets don’t want to play with their cat (or doggie) but Mama loves my spunk. It makes her laugh! She rescues my toys from the dastardly sofa and 95% of the time she will immediately jump up and come play with me when demanded. Obviously, there is still room for improvement.
4. She Has Sucker Written All Over Her
Now my Mama isn’t a pushover over everything, just me. MaxE gets what MaxE wants and I instinctively knew that Mama would know that I come first, second and third. I am her best boy and she does what I tell her to do.
Let me show you …
Mama! I want treats. Right now!
Mama: No. I can barely lift you. You are getting fat.
Okay, this is still a work in progress too.
5. She Loves MaxE!
Mama was so sad when she came into the humane society. She missed the Prima Donna Cat who could not poop and was in dire need of a feline to tell her what to do. I bravely stood up and let her claim me. I knew she has a big heart and lots of love to give. Sure, she can be really needy (always waking me up to tell me that she loves me) but she’ll always be there. Just like I’ll always be there for her!
MaxE and Mama Rule Together!
There is no doubt who the boss is (me!) but Mama and I belong together like spaghetti and meatballs, mashed potatoes and gravy and Pinky and The Brain. We just fit. I am proud to be Mama’s best boy and wish the best Mama in the whole wide world a very happy birthday (and no it’s not today but soon!)
Happy birthday, Mama! Please give me extra treats!
Max